A solid relationship is based on the principle of “give and take”. In other words, you don’t take more from a relationship than you can and are willing to give back. This keeps a healthy balance between the two partners and helps to maintain harmony. But what happens if one partner’s needs are not being met? What does it mean; how should you react to your partner then, and what should you do about it?
Sometimes, an individual might be bringing some of the problem on themselves. One common behavior is a partner does not always voice what their needs are. Therefore, if your partner doesn’t truly understand exactly what your needs are then how can you expect them to know what needs they are supposed to be meeting? They’re not mind readers.
While this is not meant to throw the blame onto you, it does show the importance of being vocal as far as what your needs are. Sometimes, it is just a matter of speaking up. If nothing else, it serves as a reminder to your partner.
There are times when your needs aren’t being met on purpose. In this or these instances, there is or are other underlying problems being expressed by your partner deliberately ignoring your needs in order to hurt you. This requires delving deeper into the underlying cause so it can be addressed asap.
But most of the time, when someone’s needs are not being met it is an unintentional gesture. A partner is usually not aware they are not meeting their partner’s needs. It isn’t being done out of spite or resentment, but is purely accidental or even due to thoughtlessness.
Since we all have different needs, it is impossible to say what is effective in one relationship will be in another couples relationship. Some people require more attention and connection than others. This is not to be confused with being needy, but rather forms a basis of their needs and how important they are to their intimate partner.
In order to achieve true happiness in a relationship and take the opportunity to remain close, it is vital to sit down as a couple and talk over what your needs are on a regular basis. Allowing negativity to fester and build without being vocal is not healthy. As needs change, these changes have to be voiced so it doesn’t appear as if they are being ignored or cast aside. Expressing needs are essential to a good relationship. Keeping them to yourself will only cause problems.